Source: chimesdesign.com via Emily on Pinterest

 

I’m really really (REALLY!) trying to take this quote to heart.

… but

this weight-loss ride is kind of hard. Okay, it’s really hard. And pretty much makes me want to cry sometimes a lot.

I get frustrated very easily, and if you’ve been a reader for more than a few days, I’m sure you’ve noticed. ;) I’m constantly riding a roller-coaster of emotions, which is either being fueled by motivation or by letting that frustration slow me down. I mentioned recently that I tend to get too caught up in what other people are doing and how they are finding success when I am not. I want to be those people that can go running 3x a week and drop 3lbs. But I’m not. Not even close. Dear Green-Eyed monster, you suck.

I’ve been trying to figure out a game plan. I mean c’mon. I work out 5 days a week, my food logs are right on target, and I’m guzzling water like a crazy-person. Yet this morning I woke up to a 3lb gain. I know bodies fluctuate, but I’ve seen this pattern before. It goes something like this: I give it my all = lose 2lbs in a month. I give it my all the next month = I gain 6lbs in a month. I get frustrated and stop trying = lose 6lbs. I get motivated and try again, and the cycle repeats itself! So, over the course of 3 months I’ll wind up 2lbs down. Still with me? It makes no sense. I”m baffled.

What am I going to do?
(1) Talk to my doctor, again. I really like her as a doctor, but she seems kind of lost in the weight-loss department. Last time I brought in my food logs and talked about my exercising and how I’m still not losing. Her response? Have you ever thought about surgery? When I said I was unwilling to consider that option, she just kind of shrugged and told me to keep at it, and things will eventually work. I’m tired of waiting for eventually to get here. It’s been years.

(2) Seek out a new therapist.I stopped seeing my last one around the time Adam’s father passed away. We weren’t gelling. I need a “this is what you do” kind of therapist. Not one that sits there and nods, closing with a bland “great work today. see you next time.” I know that my emotions get the best of me. I’d like to deal with the issues that are holding me back mentally.

I’m not writing this post from a hysterical place, so please don’t worry. I know that my body isn’t responding the way it should be. Maybe there’s something larger going on here. Part of me hopes there is. Is that weird?

 

 

xo – Emily
Be strong. Be fearless. Be you.

 

 

Talk to me!! Any advice for me? Have you been through something similar?

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categories: Health Team, Struggles22 comments

  • Em King

    Hang in there, Emily! I know the feeling. Question, are you eating ENOUGH? I like the bodyweight x 11 rule for calories. There are so many calculators and whatnot, but that makes it easy. And every food logging site on the internet has calories wayyy too low for most women. Just something to think about…but remember this is a journey. It’s not a destination and it’s going to be with you for the rest of your life, so you are right. You best enjoy the ride! HANG IN!

    • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

      Thanks for that suggestion, Em! I use Loseit.com to track everything, and according to them I should be eating around 1,800 a day to lose 2lbs a week. I weigh 267 currently …. so maybe this is still too low? SO CONFUSING.

      Do you have any experiences with registered dietitians? Maybe I should seek one of those out to help me get down to the bottom of all this.

      Thanks again – I’ll look into this! <3

      • http://twitter.com/mezzsays_ *trix

        I think the registered dietician idea is a good one. You should be seeing more results on a more consistent basis and I feel like you’ve done all the obvious things (cutting out processed foods, etc.). Someone who really knows what they’re talking about could help you find a new method. *hugs* Frustration really sucks.

        • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

          of course, seeing an RD is one of the only things not covered on our plan. Balls. Might have to bite that bullet anyway!

          • http://twitter.com/mezzsays_ *trix

            Oh, boo. :(

          • Jess

            Do you have a hyvee near you? Mine has a registered dietician on staff. You can see them for as little as $119.

      • Em King

        Yes, LoseIT and MFP are way tooooo low. Likely what’s going on here is that you are eating too few calories and your body is storing the fat since it’s in a bit of starvation mode. Try and up it for a week and I will bet you will see it start to move. I eat bodyweight x 10 on my low activity days, bodyweight x 11 on my average workout days and bodyweight x 12 on the days I workout SUPER hard. I’ve lost 50 lbs in the last year. Also, get your thyroid tested if you haven’t already. And 3lbs a week is not realistic, keep-it-off-forever weight loss. 1 lb a week is healthy! And if you aren’t strength training with HEAVY weights, I’d add that into your mix (new here so pardon me for just getting around your blog) Thanks for the comment yesterday. I’d love to connect on Facebook too :) I’m a big fan of Emily’s! ;)

        • Em King

          Oh, and in your case, I’d be eating 2500 calories AT LEAST per day. I know it seems counter-intuitive, but this is the way our bodies work. You have to fuel your body well to lose or it just holds on to it forever!

        • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

          I did some googling around and found a couple of RD’s sites that are echoing what you’re saying! Looks like I need closer to 2,700 to maintain, so around 2,500 to see results. Why does Lose it set so low?! And more importantly, how come some people can lose weight like that? Not just some people … A LOT of people! (GRRR!)

          I just re-set my Loseit goal to 2590 calories a day. This also kind of makes sense to me, b/c when I “give up” and just eat normally with out exercising, I seem to lose weight. Obviously because I’m netting more calories(?) All of this makes me wish I had majored in nutrition in college. ;)

          Again, thanks for all the advice! I’m so glad to have you as a reader and blog friend! <3

  • http://www.lifeplusrunning.com/ calee himes

    Maybe there is something larger going on here. I hate the idea of surgery. But for some people it’s worked well. I don’t like the idea. And I don’t think it’s for you either.

    So here’s a question … have you considered changing what you do? It looks like you mostly do cardio intervals for your high intensity cardio. And you strength train. These are good things, but they’re not going to result in huge weight loss. Even your long walks aren’t going to contribute. They’re all GOOD things. But if you want to see those big results, you’re looking at real intense cardio.

    That’s why those people that run 3x a week are losing 3 lbs a week. They commit to a few hours of hard cardio.

    Cardio everyday isn’t good. So mixing it up like you’ve been doing is a great idea. But I’m suggesting that you find a machine (yuck … I know) that you don’t HATE and commit yourself to 30 mins 3-4 x a week, then 35 mins, then 40, then 45, then 50, and so on (every 2 weeks or so you’ll want to increase). You can do cardio intervals on the machine, but you’ll want to shoot for your max heart rate but not complete rest for your rest interval (so for me, 160ish and 130ish) so you’re working hard the whole time. Make a game of it … maybe do a 5 min warmup, 1 min hard, 2 mins rest, 2 min hard, 2 min rest, 3 min hard, 2 min rest, 4 min hard, 2 min rest, 5 min hard, 2 min rest, and back down to your 5 min cooldown.

    Just a thought. That’s what has always worked for me in the past (and I’m reading this going, seriously … I have to work that hard for my 5-10 vanity lbs? barf). It’s worked well for Mark too. I had him doing intervals for 30-45 mins on stair stepper or the bike (bike would be your best option — recumbent — for low impact) 3x a week in January-Feb and he was down almost 15 lbs. Biking will also help you towards your running goal.

    Anyway … more unsolicited advice. But if you are interested in me putting together a program for you (read, I’m not an expert, but I’ve put together a few for others in the past … need to get my CPT ASAP) … shoot me a message. And hell, I could even commit to doing it with you.

    • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

      Calee, I would LOVE to do a cardio plan with you!!

      I’m looking into what’s available for free in terms of cardio around my house. We just moved so I had to cancel my gym membership. There might be a rec center or something, though. And i’m constantly scouring craigslist / freecycle! If you hear of anyone in the Ames area that wants to get rid of a cardio piece. LET ME KNOW :D

      I have a feeling you may be right. I’m doing a lot of cardio, but not like I used to. (Hitting the elliptical for hill intervals for 45 or whatever.)

      I’m pretty much willing to do whatever it takes to avoid surgery. I know I can do this – I’m just not doing something right, you know what I mean?

      Thanks, friend!!

  • Sheila B.

    There really might be something else wrong. My mom probably has sleep apnea and her doctor said it’s pretty much impossible go lose weight with it. My uncle has thyroid problems, which also makes it very hard to lose weight. I hope you don’t have anything seriously wrong, but if you do, I hope someone can help figure out what it is so it can get fixed.

    Also, if you change your habits from right on track to frustrated and letting it slide every other month, your body might just be seriously confused and can’t get into a “normal” anymore, be it healthy or otherwise. I always find that my weight loss every week is directly related to what I did/ate about two weeks before, so there’s definitely a delay, at least in my book. That might be why when you’re on track for a month you don’t see it until the next month, at which point you’ve already gotten frustrated and off-track so the next month when you’re back on track you see gains. I don’t really know any of this for sure, I’m just rambling about my experience :)

    I think you’re awesome, not only for dealing with the roller coaster of weight loss, but letting us all share the ride. Keep on trucking!

    • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

      Thanks, Sheila!

      I know exactly what you mean about the delayed response thing. I know that it takes my body a few weeks to click in, sometimes. But maybe it’s just taking longer like you’ve suggested! When I let myself give up, it’s always on the exercising front. I still eat pretty healthy. So maybe I’m just exercising wrong? Blah – I”m rambling. ;)

      Great suggestion though. I might just be one of those people that has to give 100% every. single. day. forever. (I feel tired already. ha!)

  • http://twitter.com/SunflowerSpruce Sara

    Awh, friend, I’m sorry. I hear ya for sure. This long battle of weight is one we all hate, it sucks. Have you considered that there might be other factors? An allergy to a food (can cause stress on the system, prohibiting weight loss and causing inflammation) or just in general stress and that’s adding to the ups and downs? If you have already looked into these then I apologize. But what about your hormones? Those can also play a part. Just a few thoughts.

    • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

      I’m wondering about the allergy thing. Will definitively bring that up with my doctor! I think i’m just going to go in there and be like “TEST EVERYTHING!!!” and see what happens ;)

  • http://www.forkyou-noforkyou.com/ Christina Lasalle

    I just recently had to break up with my doctor and it sucks. As all breakups, it’s for the best. I liked my doctor, she was really nice BUT she wasn’t a good fit for me to keep her as a doctor. maybe it’s time you think about maybe switching, it’s nothing personal. It’s all about your goals and reaching them.

    • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

      Yup, sounds like I’m in the same boat. I see her soon anyway, and will talk to her then. Maybe I just caught her on a bad day. BUT, it sounds like I need to break it off!

  • Allison

    maybe if your doctor is clueless then she should refer you to someone who can help! Surgery shouldn’t be the first answer. Sometimes there are medical reasons for weigh loss or gain. Not saying that’s the reason but a doctor should know to check those things out. I hate when doctors go straight to a ‘easy’ option-throw you on pills or surgery etc. ugh that’s really frustrating. Keep your head up and find a good doctor who can help you and give you options. Love you.

    • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

      Thanks, cuz. <3 I'm going to talk to her next week when I see her and see what she can recommend as far as a specialist or registered dietitian or SOMETHING.

  • http://twitter.com/runningknitwit Emily Lieser

    Oh Em, this is so where I am this morning! I haven’t been actually counting my calories, but I know that I am taking in less. I am working out every other day. I am getting good sleep these days. And the scale hasn’t budged. In three weeks. This morning I weighed myself and was up a bit again. I was so frustrated I wanted to cry. I just don’t know what else to do! I even got to the point where I had given up caffeine as I know it can hinder weight loss. It wasn’t making a difference, so I am now allowing myself to have coffee again (yay!).
    As for your doctor, maybe she can refer you to someone that can help you better than she can? As surgery should be an absolutely last resort for anyone (I am surprised she even offered it first!) I think that she should help you find someone that can help you pinpoint where to tweak things a bit. I would be frustrated if my doc’s only solution was surgery or keep doing what you’ve been doing for years with no results.
    Losing weight is hard, but you are strong. And I know that you can get through this! You are beautiful inside and out. Enjoy the ride :)

  • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

    OH my goodness gracious, I’m SO increddibly sorry that I didn’t see this comment until now! It somehow got stuck in the spam folder. (ugh!!)

    Thank you, beyond words, for sharing your story with me. It’s comments like this and readers like you that make all of this crazy writing I do worthwhile!!!! You should be so proud of both you and your husband for taking steps to make your health a priority. That is inspiring and remarkable. KEEP IT UP!!! :D :D

    Oh, and yes, I’ve had my thyroid checked. (un)fortuantely (?) nothing is wrong. ;)

  • http://www.FitandFreeEmily.com Emily

    Meegan!
    I’m so sorry that I never saw this comment until today. Somehow my spam folder got a hold of it.

    Thank you for your suggestions – they are super helpful. I recently started seeing a registered dietitian, so a lot of questions have been answered with her. I’m not sure I’ve ever had my hormones tested (which means I haven’t, probably!) so I’ll look into that ASAP.

    I’m beyond excited to see you (and Tara) and Fitbloggin. Hugs all around!